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Woody Allen quotes

Woody Allen

Heywood "Woody" Allen is an American film director, writer, actor, and comedian whose career spans more than six decades and multiple Academy Award-winning films. He began his career writing material for television in the 1950s, mainly Your Show of Shows (1950–1954) working alongside Mel Brooks, Carl Reiner, Larry Gelbart, and Neil Simon. He also published several books featuring short stories and wrote humor pieces for The New Yorker. In the early 1960s, he performed as a stand-up comedian in Greenwich Village alongside Lenny Bruce, Elaine May, Mike Nichols, and Joan Rivers. There he developed a monologue style and the persona of an insecure, intellectual, fretful nebbish. He released three comedy albums during the mid to late 1960s, earning a Grammy Award for Best Comedy Album nomination for his 1964 comedy album entitled simply Woody Allen. In 2004, Comedy Central ranked Allen fourth on a list of the 100 greatest stand-up comedians, while a UK survey ranked Allen the third-greatest comedian.
Reference: Wikipedia


Woody Allen Quotes Page 4

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The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.
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How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?
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How is it possible to find meaning in a finite world, given my waist and shirt size?
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I don't want to achieve immortality through my work ... I want to achieve it through not dying.
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Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.


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It is impossible to experience one's death objectively and still carry a tune.
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Not only is there no God, but try getting a plumber on weekends.
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To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.
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Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all.
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My success has allowed me to strike out with a higher class of women.

           

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